His story 43: Abiding

Thankfully we do not ever have to leave God’s presence.
Though we may need to set apart times to engage with him and to hear his voice He is always with us.
The more we intently seek to communicate with him the more we become aware He is near to us at all times. Even when we sleep.
Even when our minds are fully engaged in things that we are doing. He can invade our thinking and give us ideas and speak to us through our circumstances and activities.
Yet I found that in order to have constant peace, the peace that comes from knowing that He is with me, I need to make the choice to trust him at all times.
I need to belief that indeed He never leaves me.
Believing this has been the greatest struggle in my life.
There is really nothing that I desire more than to be with God.
But their are so many things vying for my attention that I easily get distracted and afraid. Thinking that somehow God is not with me when my mind is fully engaged in something else and I cannot intently put my attention towards him.
The truth is that of course I do not contain God in my mind.
If I could I would be above him. I would control God.
It is not my constant deliberately thinking about God that keeps him close to me.
Rather it is a constant trust in him that He is with me all the time that gives me peace and an awareness of his presence.
I belief that is what the bible means when it says that God gives peace to those whose mind is stayed on him.
It means that I lean on him. Through the conviction that He never leaves me.
And I belief this takes childlike faith.
I need to belief that He is faithfull at all times.
I need to belief that his love and nearness does not depend on my good behaviour.
Rather his commitment to me is based on the covenant He made with me.
It is purely based on the blood of Jesus that was shed for me.
The bible calls this the blood of the covenant. It seals it.
Jesus bought me with his own life, his own blood, and now I belong to him.
Of course the whole world belongs to God, but by freely surrendering my life to him I become his own in a different way.
My heart is his now and He will never betray it.
He will always lead me to his ways, if I were to go astray.
Jesus is a shepherd of his people, that does not leave the lost sheep behind.
He always goes after them and binds their wounds and brings them back to the safety of the fold where they belong.
The safety of his arms. His wings.